31/01/2003
I feel I must apologise.
My satirical juices have not been flowing this month. Now isn't that a nasty thought, especially for those who have met me!
I believe the reason for this has been my January health drive. I gave up the booze, have been going to the gym most days and have even partaken of a diet. I have lost one stone and all the cute girls on reception have remarked on how much better I am looking. I have however come to the conclusion that none of this will help me live longer, it will just feel that way!
Don't you just love Astra Zeneca. On the way into work this morning I bumped into an analyst I know. he asked me what positions I had at the moment. I told him the only one was long AZN. He told me I was a Muppet. That I may be but I am also a Muppet who has made 12.5% on that position in two days!
Today Supertone has been granted an audience with his holiness the "Shrub". He will no doubt kneel before him and kiss his ring and then they shall pray together. The Shrub will be praying to remember who the sycophantic fool in front of him is whilst our beloved PM will be praying for protection from the axis of evil; France, Germany and the labour party. Poor chap, it's not easy being the political wing of the conservative party. Still we are lucky to have him, afterall, we are now to be allowed to have sex in public lavatories; he is obviously after George Michaels vote.
Monday will see Potter return and the Muppet of the Month award for january. If you have any nominations please hurry and for those readers at a certain market-makers, staff with gay hairstyles is reason enough. And yes "Pet Shop Boys I do mean you, or is it now the Fun Boy three!
Harry